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Gambler and The Auditor December 2, 2009

Posted by epwait in Jokes.
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During an IRS audit, the auditor looked at the tax payer and exclaimed…

… “Well, sir, you have an extravagant lifestyle and no full-time employment, which you explain by saying that you win money gambling. I’m not sure the IRS finds that believable.”

“I’m a great gambler, and I can prove it,” says Ralph.

“How about a demonstration?”

The auditor thinks for a moment and said, “Okay. Go ahead.”

Ralph says, “I’ll bet you a thousand dollars that I can bite my own eye.”

The auditor thinks a moment and says, “No way! It’s a bet.”

Ralph removes his glass eye and bites it. The auditor’s jaw drops.

Ralph says, “Now, I’ll bet you two thousand dollars that I can bite my other eye.”

The auditor can tell Ralph isn’t blind, so he takes the bet.

Ralph removes his dentures and bites his good eye.

The stunned auditor now realizes he has wagered and lost three grand, with Ralph’s attorney as a witness. He starts to get nervous.

“Want to go double or nothing?” Ralph asks.

“I’ll bet you six thousand dollars that I can stand on one side of your desk, and pee into that wastebasket on the other side, and never get a drop anywhere in between.”

The auditor, twice burned, is cautious now, but he looks carefully and decides there’s no way this guy can manage that stunt, so he agrees again.

Ralph stands beside the desk and unzips his pants, and urinates all over the desk.

The auditor leaps with joy, realizing that he has just turned a major loss into a huge win.

But Ralph’s attorney moans and puts his head in his hands.

“Are you okay?” the auditor asks.

“Not really,” says the attorney.

“This morning, when Ralph told me he’d been summoned for an audit, he bet me twenty thousand dollars that he could come in here and pee all over your desk and that you’d be happy about it.”

Shareapic a Fun Way to Share Your Pictures November 27, 2009

Posted by epwait in Funny pics.
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Well looking around the net you can find all kinds of neat sites and Shareapic happens to be a great one share your pictures and earn a little extra cash that’s pretty much the gist of the neat web site. Every 1000 pictures viewed and you earn about .22 cents. not bad for sharing pictures.
clipped from www.shareapic.net

 

 

 

 

 

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Why Do You Tweet? November 24, 2009

Posted by epwait in Twitter Friends.
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This post is a work in progress.  to be reread and edited many times is my guess.  I do know I still need to add quite a few answers to the question.  I look forward to your criticism and input to improve this post.

I ask the question “Why Do You Tweet?” on Twitter.¬† I realize that this question has most definitely been asked before, but I was still curious.¬† What I found wasn’t to surprising and you may also not be surprised, most people are trying to find a connection.

When I say connection it comes in many ways, you have marketer’s, celebrities, news seekers, humorists and much more.¬† What I did notice was the fact that most of us just want to be heard we want someone to listen to us, the connection comes down need the need of being wanted.¬† The ultimate need for humanity to socialize.

We all have an instinct to want to connect we go to parties, we go out to dinner or coffee with friends or to meet new people.¬† This for the majority of the world is all that we need.¬† But people who Tweet have a greater need there curiosity for what’s happening in the world a crave and in fact may be even an addiction to get more information and to share that information on a huge scale.

Tweeters want to socialize with the world they want to be heard and in some ways want to be celebrities in there own right.¬† As for why celebrities tweet well it’s to talk about what they are working on, to let fans know, in there own words what they are really up to.¬† Yes we heard that before, however I have a belief that many celebrities may have a need to connect because they want to socialize outside their own celebrity status. To see a little of the average person and possibly find what’s real.

Here are some of the answers I got and more are to be added.

Find out more About The Heart Sleeves

  1. TheHeartSleeves

    @epwait Twitter is like a wall. You throw your tweets against it & see if they stick or fall into obscurity. 2:39 PM Nov 17th from web in reply to epwait

  2. TheHeartSleeves TheHeartSleeves

    @epwait I started tweeting 2 promote my band, then I found a quilt-ish community of other promoters, we’re all circumventing death in limbo. 2:35 PM Nov 17th from web in reply to epwait

  3. modernsextrash modernsextrash

    hahahaha @epwait because the world is counting on me to. 2:35 PM Nov 17th from TweetDeck

  4. TheHeartSleeves TheHeartSleeves

    @epwait I tweet 2 have audience, however random, for my thoughts & music. It is the easiest way to raise the water level 1 pebble @ a time. 2:33 PM Nov 17th from web in reply to epwait

  5. Bruce O'Neal houstonmacbro

    @epwait I tweet because it connects me to others. I DO have something to say. Not ALWAYS profound, but good enough. #amahighered 2:32 PM Nov 17th from TweetDeck in reply to epwait

  6. AG theamygrace

    @epwait I tweet to prevent you from taking over the world. 4:07 AM Nov 13th from Brizzly in reply to epwait

  7. ugly websites uglywebsites

    @epwait i tweet to make up for the ppl too lazy to tweet. 3:27 AM Nov 13th from web in reply to epwait

  8. Justin JustinSxE

    @epwait Because updating my Facebook status annoys my friends. 3:25 AM Nov 13th from web in reply to epwait

  9. Darla a.k.a. Missy Mnmissy

    @epwait I tweet to not only network for a job…but also to meet people from around the globe! Lots of fabulous friendship created here! 1:36 AM Nov 13th from TweetDeck

  10. ugly websites uglywebsites

    @epwait i have 589 channels-> and nothing good on ANY OF THEM 10:42 PM Nov 12th from web in reply to epwait

  11. ugly websites uglywebsites

    @epwait (longer)-> keeps me “connected”-> if u’re able to edit out the crap, there’s good “news” on here. ppl tweet about things before the 10:37 PM Nov 12th from web in reply to epwait

  12. ugly websites uglywebsites

    @epwait I Tweet Because… nothing good on TV (short answer) 10:35 PM Nov 12th from web in reply to epwait

  13. Susan Elaine BuzzEdition

    @epwait I tweet because I enjoy sharing unique stories & interesting people with others. Basically, I do it for the social connection ~hugs~ 7:16 PM Nov 12th from TweetDeck

  14. Donny Gonzales Donrengon

    @epwait I tweet cause I like having an outlet and don’t care who can read my inner thoughts. 9:35 AM Nov 12th from Echofon in reply to epwait

  15. Milana Ryan rmilana

    cc @epwait > RT @lammiia: @rmilana I tweet to air my views about topics and engage in interesting discussions. 7:31 AM Nov 12th from dabr

  16. Scott Taylor ScottATaylor

    @epwait I tweet to meet people and share information 8:53 PM Nov 11th from UberTwitter in reply to epwait

  17. Nichelle Pace STYLEMOM

    @epwait to engage, laugh, connect, get news, promote site, consumer reasearch, i’m a chatterbox & a tad nosey, & get the pulse of people 8:33 PM Nov 11th from Snaptu in reply to epwait

  18. Milana Ryan rmilana

    @epwait tweet sounds better than bark ūüėõ hehe just for having fun and connect with people 8:23 PM Nov 11th from dabr in reply to epwai

    1. Jennifer Lee scarletmandy

      @epwait or else I might just b an attention whore lmao 6:48 PM Nov 11th from mobile web

    2. Jennifer Lee scarletmandy

      @epwait because I love socializing and there’s not much of that in a small town lol 6:48 PM Nov 11th from mobile web

    3. Helen Sventitsky treaclelilly

      @epwait Actually, no. I liked that answer, so I RT’d it. I tweet to talk, kvetch, share, enjoy, sing, wax poetic, muse (no, not the band). 5:48 PM Nov 11th from Echofon in reply to epwait

    4. Changa Gorham CGArticleDir

      @epwait I Tweet to spread Love, Value, and good information to those who might crave it….. 5:46 PM Nov 11th from TweetDeck in reply to epwait

    5. Barbee keeperofdreams

      I tweet to create, intrigue,share, flirt, laugh, tease, and to open my mind… @epwait Why Do You Tweet.? 5:24 PM Nov 11th from TweetDeck

    6. chetan cheth

      @epwait to connect with liked minded people ( designers) and also to connect with the rest of the world with the power of 140 characters! 5:04 PM Nov 11th from web in reply to epwait

    7. Tiffany santasdevil

      Cuz I stopped doing drugs n this is just as gratifying .RT @epwait: @santasdevil Why Do You Tweet? this is for an upcoming blog post 5:00 PM Nov 11th from TweetDeck

    8. J Weaverous

      @epwait i tweet because its a great way to connect, communicate a interact with people across the globe many whom id never have met irl 4:45 PM Nov 11th from Echofon in reply to epwait

    9. Amy Walker IvySunny

      @epwait Why? Because I want to make new friends. I want to make people smile and laugh. Once in a while, I succeed ūüėČ 4:44 PM Nov 11th from TweetDeck in reply to epwait

    10. Dan Weatherall Dan303

      RT @epwait: Why do you tweet? your answe…..[I tweet Because its good promotion for my blog and music. It’s also good to chat to followers] 4:21 PM Nov 11th from TweetDeck

    11. Allison Janney allisonjanney

      @epwait To share, collaborate, and learn from other PR studs, profs and pros. Can’t NOT do it going into PR. Also super fun/addictive. 4:15 PM Nov 11th from TweetDeck in reply to epwait

    12. Miss Cathy OhioSteelerGirl

      @epwait It gives you an opportunity to “meet” people you would most likely never know. 3:58 PM Nov 11th from web in reply to epwait

    13. Verleen Wonderly verwon

      @epwait Cool! You can take ‘especially men’ onto the end! Have to drive them crazy, it’s my calling. 3:48 PM Nov 11th from dabr in reply to epwait

    14. purplehayz purplehayz

      @epwait I also tweet for the conversations and to give and get information 3:47 PM Nov 11th from TweetDeck

    15. Verleen Wonderly verwon

      @epwait I tweet, because good insanity MUST be shared! 3:40 PM Nov 11th from dabr

    16. Ray wei_wu_wei

      @epwait to inform, to be informed, and most importantly for fun… 3:36 PM Nov 11th from TweetDeck in reply to epwait

Bus Stop and Tight Skirt November 19, 2009

Posted by epwait in Uncategorized.
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One day, at a bus stop there was a girl who was wearing a skintight miniskirt. When the bus arrived and it was her turn to get on, she realized that her skirt was so tight she couldn’t get her foot high enough to reach to step.

Thinking it would give her enough slack to raise her leg, she reached back and unzipped her skirt a little. She still could not reach the step. Embarrassed, she reached back once again to unzip it a little more. Still, she couldn’t reach the step.

So, with her skirt zipper halfway down, she reached back and unzipped her skirt all the way. Thinking that she could get on the step now, she lifted up her leg only to realize that she still couldn’t reach the step.

So, seeing how embarrassed the girl was, the man standing behind her put his hands around her waist and lifted her up on to the first step of the bus. The girl turned around furiously and said, “How dare you touch my body that way, I don’t even know you!”

Shocked, the man says, “Well, ma’am, after you reached around and unzipped my fly three times, I kinda figured that we were friends.”

Income for Life ‚ÄĒ Start Earning Money Now November 14, 2009

Posted by epwait in Uncategorized, Video.
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GDI has been a great blessing for me while I was Living out of my car in Florida before coming up to Minnesota and when I had no job for 45 plus days. GDI actually gave me the extra cash flow to get by on, while I found my job at OM Minneapolis http://www.omminneapolis.com/ 

I highly recomend this company,visit my site at www.website.ws/epwait and enjoy the video information here also.

Vodpod videos no longer available.
 
 

more about “Income for Life ‚ÄĒ Start Earning Money…“, posted with vodpod

 

Tweet Me Dead! November 12, 2009

Posted by epwait in Uncategorized.
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English is a funny old language. Pain, pleasure, hate and love. The same word can cover them all.

“Tweet” just about covers everything.

It can be used as a verb both transitive (Eric tweeted Kari) and intransitive (Kari was tweeted by Eric).

It can be an active verb (Eric really gives a tweet). Or a passive verb (Kari really doesn’t give a tweet).

It can be used as a noun (Kari is a fine tweet). It can be used as an adjective (Kari is tweeting beautiful).

It can be used to describe the whole spectrum of emotions:

Aggression:               Tweet you.

Confusion:                 What the tweet?

Despair:                       Tweeted again.

Difficulty:¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬† I can’t understand this tweeting business.

Dismay:                        Oh, tweet it!

Displeasure:               What the tweet is going on?

Fraud:                           I got tweeded by my insurance agent.

Incompetence:¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†He’s all tweeted up.

Laziness:                      She just tweets about.

Passive:                        Tweet me.

Philosophical:            Who gives a tweet?

Problem:¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬† I guess I’m tweeted now.

Rebellion:                     Tweet off!

Religious:                      Holy tweet.

Suprise:                          Tweeting Incredible!

It can be used to tell time – It’s five tweeting thirty.

It can be used in business РHow did he get that tweeting  job?

It can be a prediction – Oh, will I get tweeted!

It can have maternal connotations – as in Mothertweeter.

It can be nautical – Tweet the Admiral.

It can be Political – Tweet Obama.

It can open the door to wonderful relationships – Let’s tweet.

It can be used to enhance the meaning of a word – Beautweetiful, tertweetingrific or absotweetinglutely.

How could anyone be annoyed when you say tweet?

Tell someone “tweet you” today.

But not your mother tweeter.

Alternatively you can substitute “fuck” for “tweet” if you wish. ūüėČ

Help Me Support Children’s Miracle Network November 12, 2009

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Many of you may have seen that I support charities one being UNICEF on Twitter @UNICEFUSA, that’s not the only charity I support. I also have a Squidoo page “Charity may it not be a rarity www.squidoo.com/bighelp and now I just added Children’s Miracle Network to my blog. So please click on the SocialVibe widget to the side and do an activity it’s free just doing one collects balloons for a donation.

To Earn a Little More Green November 12, 2009

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I love what I do for a living really I do, cooking has always brought pleasure to me. However my profession isn’t exactly easy to make a lot of money in, not unless you get lucky or you make some great connections, which thankfully I believe I have done of late.

So I have found other methods to make money and that is online. I have been at it for a few years and have found some great ways to do it. I consider them investments long term growth plans with huge jumps in income as they grow. None of them are guaranteed to make you wealthly overnight but they all give you repeated income on a regular basis.

The biggest problem you may come across¬†is the lack of faith people¬†see in a business model like this. Everyone, me included has looked for a quick buck business, they don’t exist. I have discovered over time it is all about persistance your willing to persever and build your business that creates the success. Most us us give up to easily and get discourage, we tend not to commit.

If you have the desire and the plan to succeed you will, in what ever venture you decide to do. below are the business’s I have chosen, prehaps they are for you or perhaps they aren’t I leave it for you to decide. If you have a question go ahead and leave a comment or contact via Twitter¬†I will be sure to get back to you.¬†When you join one of the business’s below you will definately have a way to contact me.

This is the frist online business I tried:

GDI Global Domain International, It is truly fantastic. Very simple; Buy your domain and then you can offer the same to the next person, the link will take you to a video it explains how the company works.

Next:

SFI, this company is very interesting because you start for FREE you can even make money just by promoting on a blog and getting a sale for FREE. Downside of FREE is it slow to succeed this way. The companines hole thing is co-oping to earn much like Amway. They just introduced this year something called TripleClicks this has been very awesome for the company and those who use it.

Next:

AdvoCare: This company is my favorite. Instead of going to GNC why not have my own that I get 20% to 40% savings on product just for $79¬†for a Distributor Kit and a Website. I buy my product and save 20% promote my site and customers buy my product, I earn 20% as sales volume increase I earn up to 40%. Once a year I renew my Distributor’s lisence for $50. This company has endorser’s like Drew Brees and Kyle Orton, this year they are the first direct sales company to Sponser college football the “AdvoCare 100 Indepence Bowl” on December 28th, 2009 on ESPN2.

I certainly hope this post made you think about ways “To Earn a Little More Green”

All About Style @STYLEMOM November 11, 2009

Posted by epwait in Twitter Friends.
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I am not one who is up to date on fashion or for that matter style but I do know beauty and I have always had an eye for it. One place you could consider checking out if you have an eye for beauty to, is www.stylemom.com, I would say if you want to stay up to date on fashion you ought to check STYLEMOM out via her website or just get to know her on Twitter @STYLEMOM . I consider her a good friend on twitter and enjoy her humor and the fun she brings to my #snuggiemafia group via Twitter. Now shoo off you go stop wasting time here, visit her website and visit her on Twitter. Help spread some beauty.

AdvoCare Gets in the Game! October 23, 2009

Posted by epwait in AdvoCare.
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AdvoCare is the proud sponsor of the Independence Bowl in Shreveport, La., on Dec. 28, 2009. The Independence Bowl is a post-season NCAA-endorsed Division 1 college footbal bowl game that has featured top college teams for the past 34 years. The 2009 AdvoCare V100 Independenc Bowl is expected to capture an audience of millions through its national coverage on ESPN2.
I am looking forward to this big event because it is the first time any direct sales company has ever sponsered a bowl game. I find it very exciting an I am glad to be part of AdvoCare.